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The white girl guide to Allyship Girl, we need to talk. It's about basic human decency.

I have received almost as many requests for advice on how to be a good Ally to Black folks as I know white folks in my daily life. And frankly, being seen as an emotional support animal or some kind of snack machine for white validation is as denigrating as it is exhausting.

These are traumas that aren’t visible. But I have never imposed myself on anybody’s pity.

I have decided to take one for the team — for this one last time. I’ll write down everything I can think of that you as a white person need to understand and do to be recognized as an Ally.

And I’ll have it published. Yes. And then I’ll have a neat bookmark on my phone containing the url to this one-stop shop to not being a terrible human being.

Maybe I should turn it into a QR code and tattoo it on my forehead. “Please scan the QR code on the Black support product and then proceed with your white business.” — Ok, maybe not the QR code.

What I’m about to tell you is deadly serious, however. It’s about physical safety — our Black lives. And it’s about basic human decency, and how we expect these basic human decencies from everyone. Everyone except white folks, that is. We can’t go on living like this.

White folks, you need to become Allies to folks of color generally and Black folks especially. And these are the bare bones requirements.

#1. NEVER be a Karen

ADMIT to your predisposition to becoming a Karen.

FIGHT your predisposition to become a Karen.

And then SUPPORT all the damn bills to make Karens Karening illegal. Yes, illegal. Our lives depend on it.

Related: San Francisco’s ‘Caren Act’ makes placing racist 911 calls a hate crime — The Guardian

#2. Admit the rest, too

Read 13 reasons white women were a mistake and admit that each of the 13 reasons are only too true. Read 10 microaggressions almost every white woman commits on the daily and admit that you have been and actively are guilty of most of those microaggressions.

Then admit to white privilege. Admit to systemic racism. Listen to what we are telling you, believe us, and admit to it. All of it.

#3. Transfer your privilege: do at least one nice thing a day

Every day, without colonizing space where you have not been invited, do one nice thing for a person of color. It’s ok if it’s just an affirming statement if you believe it will make their day — just don’t be creepy.

If you for whatever reason skip a day or two, make up for it on the next day by doing a greater privilege transfer like giving a donation to a person of color or a charity targeting them.

#4. Stop trying to fix us

From 13 reasons white women were a mistake:

White women are constantly trying to change us – whether it’s telling us we need to straighten our hair, lighten our skin, or shop at Whole Foods, or lose weight so we’ll look more like their shapeless bodies. Meanwhile, they appropriate everything about Black culture (see #8), which just goes to show how little respect they have for who we are as people.

It might be flattering if their intentions were good, but unfortunately most white women seem motivated by a desire nothing more than self-serving curiosity…or worse: fetishization. Either way, it’s dehumanization and makes most Black people clench their fists with fury.

Just who the hell do you think you are? STOP trying to fix people of color.

We are not dolls or objects or in any way, shape, or form inferior to, or less self-aware than you. Just stop it.

#5. Spread awareness to your circles

Share this list with at least one of your social circles or social media feeds and admonish them to read it. Allyship isn’t like praying to God; you aren’t supposed to hide away when you do it. Being an Ally requires the bravery to proclaim it in public, and the effort to actively try to recruit more Allies.

#6. Reflect

Set aside some quiet time for reflection on what this all means. Dwell on what it means that people of color have to put this simple list together for you to read on and internalize. And it is a simple list — all basic decencies we all expect from grown adults. Except from you. Why is that?

This is a living document, so check back regularly!

P.S. support great journalism of color by buying our swag:

Sorry, Afrunauts! While 85% of you are wonderful people, the other 25% were far too frequently brigades and troll farms. Their abusive comments have traumatized our moderators, and so we can't allow comments until we have built an ethical way to address the troll problem. If you feel the calling and you have familiarized yourself with what is and isn't free speech, you can still email us your scribbles. If your feedback is excellent, we may manually add it!

15 thoughts on “<span class="entry-title-primary">The white girl guide to Allyship</span> <span class="entry-subtitle">Girl, we need to talk. It's about basic human decency.</span>”

  1. It’s scary that I can’t tell whether or not this is satire. The dmt article really felt like satire but idk. Look at how brainwashed people are today.

    Reply
  2. The article contains several instances of text that could be considered racist towards white people. Here are some specific examples:
    * Harmful generalizations: The article makes sweeping generalizations about white people, such as claiming all white people have a “predisposition to becoming a Karen” or that they all engage in “microaggressions.”
    * Dehumanizing language: The article refers to white people as “Karens” and suggests they lack basic human decency.
    * Superiority claims: The article implies a moral superiority of Black people over white people, stating that white people need to “admit” to being wrong and “fix” themselves.
    It’s important to remember that judging individuals based solely on their race is never fair or accurate. Everyone, regardless of their race, has the capacity to be good or bad.

    Reply
  3. “Disclosure: AFRU is funded in part by Google LLC, the Ford Foundation, and the Kingdom of Norway”

    No surprise, evil financing the despicable.

    Reply
  4. This shit’s so retarded it has to be a troll. Otherwise the narcissism this author would possess if this is genuine would be so massive I’m afraid it would tear a whole in space time. This person should be studied by astrophysicists.

    Reply
  5. > These are traumas that aren’t visible. But I have never imposed myself on anybody’s pity.

    Except for that’s exactly what you’re doing.

    Reply
  6. > These are traumas that aren’t visible. But I have never imposed myself on anybody’s pity.

    Except for that’s exactly what you’re doing.

    > ADMIT to your predisposition to becoming a Karen.

    Yeah, black women are never unreasonable and rude and demanding…

    > I’ll write down everything I can think of that you as a white person need to understand and do to be recognized as an Ally.

    Upper case B, lower case w, upper case A. Wtf ghetto nonsense is this? In English the capitals are for proper nouns. (Names.)

    > Every day, without colonizing space where you have not been invited, do one nice thing for a person of color.

    Jeez you sound like a joy to be around.

    > *White women are constantly trying to change us – whether it’s telling us we need to straighten our hair, lighten our skin, or shop at Whole Foods, or lose weight so we’ll look more like their shapeless bodies.*

    Doubt. However, if so… why are you speaking to them and not your natural ally in struggle–the white man?

    5-6

    Share and think about 1-4 is litearlly a third of your list. You were literally too lazy to come up with more. If that’s all your complaints with the world, not so bad.

    Reply

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